You might be a knifenut if...

whittlenut · Post by **whittlenut** » Fri Jun 16, 2006 8:34 am

You might be a knifenut if...

... the first thing you do when you're seated at a table is pickup the knives and read the names on them at every restaurant you visit.

... you go to Six Flags and you set the security officer's alarm off and you have to follow him to a little room and empty your pockets and he wants to know why you have 2 or 3 knives in each pocket.

... you stand in line for an hour and a half to tour the White House and they want let you in, so you get out of line to go hide your knife in a hollow tree, and get back in line.

(Let's hear some of the rest of you pro's add to the list. (these three are true)

Bryan · Post by **Bryan** » Fri Jun 16, 2006 6:25 pm

Great thread.

You might be a knife knut if your forearms are bald.

You might be a knife knut if your knife collection is worth more than your house.

You might be a knife knut if you have at least one knife in each room of your house and at least one in each automobile.

You might be a knife knut if your wife's curio cabinet has more of your stuff (knives) in it than her stuff.

You might be a knife knut if your kids have to share a room because the extra bedroom is your "knife room".

You might be a knife knut if you have ever traded a riding lawn mower for a knife. (Hickorynut)

You might be a knife knut if ...every time you get a package in the mail, your wife says... "how much did you spend on this knife?" ...even before anyone knows what's inside.

Bryan

9ball · Post by **9ball** » Fri Jun 16, 2006 7:09 pm

Bryan wrote:

You might be a knife knut if ...every time you get a package in the mail, your wife says... "how much did you spend on this knife?" ...even before anyone knows what's inside.

Bryan

Man.......That shoe fits here

Hukk · Post by **Hukk** » Sat Jun 17, 2006 12:10 am

Gotta agree with Bryan and 9Ball on that last one, hits home.

You might be a knife knut if you try to intercept the mail before your wife gets it.

You might be a knife knut if you ship to a friends house and he ships to yours, see it's for Bubba.

Great Post!

Bryan · Post by **Bryan** » Sat Jun 17, 2006 4:27 pm

A couple more. This is my kind of humor

...

You might be a knife knut if...

...your wife tells you to clip your toenails and you get all deffensive and say... "No way. I'm not getting rid of any of my knives

!"

...you have the 4th edition of Bernard Levine's Guide to Knives and Their Values in your bedside nightstand while your Holy Bible sits on your bookshelf cause it won't fit... (even worse if you have a 2nd copy of BLG in your bathroom for reading material).

...you have ever said "I can stop buying knives anytime I want. I just don't want to right now".

...you made a career choice to become a police officer just so you can legally buy and carry a switchblade.

...you spend more time rubbing your knives than rubbing your wives

.

Bryan

Bear Claw Chris Lappe · Sat Jun 17, 2006 5:12 pm

You install dual thumbstuds on all your wife's bras so they are "one-handed openers"........

HickoryNut · Post by **HickoryNut** » Sat Jun 17, 2006 5:59 pm

You might be a knife nut if:

You got into politics just because you hear alot about "congress"

You can carry a muskrat in one pocket, a copperhead in the other and not get bit.

You have a bowl of "peanuts" in your house worth at least five hundred dollars.

Your christmas stocking has a "Case XX" logo emboidered on it...guilty!

Tried "jewing" the clerk at Wal-Mart down on a knife.

You have pocket knife border in your kitchen.

You have ever jumped in a lake to retrieve a dropped knife.....guilty again.

You create a website called "Allaboutpocketknives.com"

You are pretty sure you could preform any minor surgery with a swiss army knife.

You carry tissues and rubber bands all the time because of the possibility of obtaining two or more knives and you dont want them to rub one another.

Strangers walk up to you without saying a word and hand you knives.

You ever tried to make a glove like Freddy Kruger wore in Nightmare on Elm Street just because you were jealous.

Cried when you saw a collector knife being abused.

Finally....You might be a knife nut if you contributed to this thread!

PA Knives · Post by **PA Knives** » Sun Jun 18, 2006 1:39 am

You might be if your computer is set to use http://www.allaboutpocketknives.com as its opening site.

YES I am guilty.

I think this has been one of the BEST threads started yet.

longbeachbum · Post by **longbeachbum** » Sun Jun 18, 2006 5:45 am

You open all your junk mail, just because it's an excuse to use your knife.

You ever made your daughter cry because you absent mindedly shredded something that she didn't want shredded.

You love dulled and broken pencils.

If your knife slips and the blade contacts your skin, and you get PO'ed that it didn't open a laceration. You immediately break out your sharpening gear to rectify the situation.

You not only sharpen your own knives, you also sharpen those of your friends and family.

You think nothing of paying $100 for your 127th pocketknife, but if you have to spend that amount on a necessity or a gift, it seems like a huge amount of money.

You generally are sporting more than one band aid at a time.

Mossdancer · Post by **Mossdancer** » Sun Jun 18, 2006 5:55 am

You might be if you buy something like this for a quarter just cause you havent seen it before,Sorry about the photo.
w.b.

Roger - 50/2050 · Post by **Roger - 50/2050** » Sun Jun 18, 2006 3:11 pm

Howdy Boys,

You may be considered a Knife Knut,

If every time you tell your Gal "Well I just won another knife auction" & all she does is raise her eyebrows & sigh then make this face after she finds out how much you spent ------------->

If every time you go to Lowes, Home Depot, True value, McCauleys or your smaller Mom & Pop Hardware stores & the first place you go is to the Pocket Knife section

Hey, "Happy Fathers Day" to all you knifer Dads out there

"Texas collector", Roger - 50/2050

JOE62 · Post by **JOE62** » Mon Jun 19, 2006 5:32 pm

You name your children Jean, John, Andrew and William Russell.
If you are watching a Rambo movie and know which one it is when he pulls out his knife.
Your nick name is stabber, slash or blade.
You clip on a knife when you put your pajamas on.
If you're late for work because you couldn't decide which EDC you wanted for the day.
You carry a diver's knife into the shower.

Don Luis · Post by **Don Luis** » Mon Jun 19, 2006 7:38 pm

You might be a knifenut if...

You rub some polishing paste on your jeans above the knee, because it helps when stropping in the field.

Luis

Hukk · Post by **Hukk** » Mon Jun 19, 2006 8:17 pm

You might be a knifenut if:
You get estimates of how much it will cost to customize your wife's steak knife set.

petesknives · Post by **petesknives** » Mon Jun 19, 2006 10:46 pm

Ya might be a Knifenut if......the ugliest knife you have ever seen is one you don't own.

ilikeknives · Post by **ilikeknives** » Tue Jun 20, 2006 9:14 pm

AWESOME THREAD !!!!

You may be considered a knife nut if:

You have taken the time to teach your loved ones and friends how to discern between a collectible knife perhaps of value, and the others not worth your time when they browse at the local rummage sales.

Those same people have you on "speed dial' for the same reason.

All of your friends receive knives in lieu of any other gifts no matter the occassion.

You compare the cost of anything versus the knife or knives you won't be getting as a result.

You make up cards for your knives which give the purchase value, and the value to you.

You have stayed up the entire night more than once doing knife related tasks, or caring for your collection.

You find yourself seriously irritated for having lost an ebay auction.

Morality actually plays a role in your hobby.

Giulty here on the AAPK homepage,,Good one PA !!

jonet143 · Post by **jonet143** » Tue Jun 27, 2006 6:43 am

you might be a knife nut if......

you just sat here and finished all these at one time

and wish there were more!

lot of fun - johnnie

longbeachbum · Post by **longbeachbum** » Sun Jul 02, 2006 12:50 am

jonet143 wrote:you might be a knife nut if......

you just sat here and finished all these at one time

and wish there were more!

Ask and ye shall receive:

http://www.bladeforums.com/forums/showt ... p?t=380459

orvet · Post by **orvet** » Sun Jul 02, 2006 4:48 am

you might be a knife nut if......

You are packing light and only have 3 knives on you (not counting the ones on your car key ring & the house/mail box key ring).........and you feel naked!

whittlenut · Post by **whittlenut** » Sun Jul 02, 2006 5:39 am

You might be knifenut if you've been reading all this cool stuff on this site for about an hour and you almost P on yourself before you jump up and run to the bathroom.

wt3l · Post by **wt3l** » Sun Jul 02, 2006 4:17 pm

Way to go Fellas,
This is truely one of the best threads we've ever done...and we've had some great ones. ok lets see if I can add...

ya might be a knife knut if:
Your co-workers ask each Monday morning...
"which ones did you buy this weekend"?

Your wife knows what "Cattaraugus" means.

You've ever traded for a knife of lesser
value just because you "KNEW" your friend
really wanted it.

You get real concerned when your issue of
Knife World is late.

Thanks guys lets keep this going.... later WT3L

4ever3 · Post by **4ever3** » Sun Jul 02, 2006 6:26 pm

whittlenut wrote:You might be knifenut if you've been reading all this cool stuff on this site for about an hour and you almost P on yourself before you jump up and run to the bathroom.

ROFLOL...Been there

whittlenut · Post by **whittlenut** » Sat Jul 15, 2006 2:39 am

When you go to visit relatives, you arrive and get outa the car, all your little nephews, cousins, (even girls) run up to you and instead of saying "Hey", they say "Did you bring me a knife?"

whittlenut · Post by **whittlenut** » Wed Aug 01, 2007 6:17 am

...If you have 5 church knives, 10 letter opening knives, 7 work at the office knives, 12 work on the job knives, 25 work in the yard around the house knives, 4 restaurant knives to carry when you eat out, and about 150 more you just like to hold and look at occasionally... and your late for work sometimes because you can't make up your mind which one you want to carry that day.

Edgewise · Post by **Edgewise** » Wed Aug 01, 2007 2:40 pm

You might be a knife-nut if...

You cut yourself so often that your wife no longer comes running but just calls out "That's nice, dear."

You insist on cutting your birthday cake with your peanut because that's the one you happen to be carrying.

You're at a party boasting about your knives and avoid eye contact with your wife because you know she's giving you "the look".

What's so great is that most of this thread sounds absolutely true.

What would our friends and family do without us and our knife quirks?

All About Pocket Knives

You might be a knifenut if...

You might be a knifenut if...

Knifenut

knife nut

Re: knife nut