I-LIKE-KNIVES,,,THAT'S ME.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2007 10:57 pm
Glenn Here.
Having clarity of hindsight, my gut aches at having contemplated how I could've handled my absence differently. I, like, or unlike, other folks you may know or have dealt with have a conscience for expecting more of myself than I gave here of recent. No excuse given. I got pretty sick, and rather than lean on friends, I let the situation get completely overwhelming. I ran and hid and withdrew, letting depression take over instead of letting the truth be ugly and scrutinized, no matter who wondered what the heck was going on
.
Briefly, I let a bad diet and some issues form a vicious circle, winding up in an intestinal perforation and subsequent severe internal infection, fever, etc, etc. I got "TOUGH" thinking I could 'walk it off'. Then, with some bad advice (including my own) left hospital care way before any sense of prudence
. Seeing money pile up without any insurance, coupled with disregard for objectivity. On the third night out of the hospital, I woke up so sick I actually could not think straight, I was coughing blood, and I could not stand up. To make this brief, I was more scared than I had ever been,,ever. God watched over me yet again, and my folks had decided to take control. God sent them over when I couldn't even shout for help. I don't recollect their arrival. OK, episode 2. My intestine was now a tear, I was MUCH worse. I found humility, but I also let my responsibilities, especially for my knife store and knife collecting world I truly love, go by the wayside. I do feel gut-sick, remorse, and lacking any excuse for letting that get so out of control.
At this point, I cannot read the postings in this index as I do not think my gut can handle the possibilities of my neglect and stress already tearing at me again.
I do say this however;
I know some of my knifer friends have stuck up for me there. To you who did, I owe the same heart-felt apology as to the new customers who deserved better treatment. In hindsight, I think I may have found a way to inform folks and handle this better. Hiding behind depression is no excuse, but that is what I did after I got too sick to handle it all. I feel ashamed to have let it go too far and get the better of me. I do care deeply about this world we are a part of; I still feel drawn.
The lesson learned here was of the deepest humility.
I have either written to,, sent the items (with some freebies and apology letter), or have resolved all issues as I write this here and now.
I am fully prepared and forthright on humility and to offer ammends. Thanks to you all for helping me to see friendship's light, without cost except for giving back to who I can offer my hand.
I am back, still recovering, but in a much better place to take things slow and be good to me,,,,,,not so deeply overwhelmed.
Think I'll just set back and watch the trees in the forest for a bit now.
Thanks for your ear,,,,,,,er,,,,,,,,eye that is.
The lord bless you all as he has me yet again.
I remain, and, I DO-----LIKE KNIVES
-Glenn
Having clarity of hindsight, my gut aches at having contemplated how I could've handled my absence differently. I, like, or unlike, other folks you may know or have dealt with have a conscience for expecting more of myself than I gave here of recent. No excuse given. I got pretty sick, and rather than lean on friends, I let the situation get completely overwhelming. I ran and hid and withdrew, letting depression take over instead of letting the truth be ugly and scrutinized, no matter who wondered what the heck was going on
Briefly, I let a bad diet and some issues form a vicious circle, winding up in an intestinal perforation and subsequent severe internal infection, fever, etc, etc. I got "TOUGH" thinking I could 'walk it off'. Then, with some bad advice (including my own) left hospital care way before any sense of prudence
At this point, I cannot read the postings in this index as I do not think my gut can handle the possibilities of my neglect and stress already tearing at me again.
I do say this however;
I know some of my knifer friends have stuck up for me there. To you who did, I owe the same heart-felt apology as to the new customers who deserved better treatment. In hindsight, I think I may have found a way to inform folks and handle this better. Hiding behind depression is no excuse, but that is what I did after I got too sick to handle it all. I feel ashamed to have let it go too far and get the better of me. I do care deeply about this world we are a part of; I still feel drawn.
The lesson learned here was of the deepest humility.
I have either written to,, sent the items (with some freebies and apology letter), or have resolved all issues as I write this here and now.
I am fully prepared and forthright on humility and to offer ammends. Thanks to you all for helping me to see friendship's light, without cost except for giving back to who I can offer my hand.
I am back, still recovering, but in a much better place to take things slow and be good to me,,,,,,not so deeply overwhelmed.
Think I'll just set back and watch the trees in the forest for a bit now.
Thanks for your ear,,,,,,,er,,,,,,,,eye that is.
The lord bless you all as he has me yet again.
I remain, and, I DO-----LIKE KNIVES
-Glenn